Recently, a member of the Misophonia Support Group on Facebook vented about a sound trigger and their interaction with another person in public. Someone commented that they should have done things differently. And, their disapproving comment included statements about not meaning to diss the OP or be disrespectful. And that may be true, but what they did was worse. They blamed the OP for the unpleasant interaction.
When a member posts that they are triggered, we take them at their word. We then offer support, or we scroll by. That’s it. Only two options. If clarification is needed, please refer to the rules, guidelines, Admin’s Tips I often post, ask a moderator, or post to the group and ask about appropriate group behavior.
Yes, people will have an opposing opinion sometimes, and respectful alternatives to action is an appropriate conversation. Yes, all opinions matter and are equal and valid. But our members don’t post to solicit blaming or to be shamed.
This is a peer-to-peer support group for people with misophonia. We’re here for the person with misophonia, not the jerks that stand too close behind you in line breathing strangely, whistle in public, eat like animals in restaurants, take forever to open their damn bags of chips in theaters, or otherwise cause us distress.
Sure, people have the right to do normal, noisy things in public, but who cares? Seriously, WHO CARES? In this group, they don’t have any rights whatsoever. Their rights are completely irrelevant. This group is the place where a person comes to vent, make observations, ask questions, and get support. And, yes, misophonia is OUR PROBLEM, this is a fact that we all already know.
Bottom line: the rules inside the group are different than the rules in the real world.